A Secret Too Heavy to Carry

 

Ever had a secret you carried so long, it felt like it was stitched into your skin? You couldn’t imagine telling anybody—not a best friend, not a pastor, not even a family member—because the shame was just that deep? That was Allison’s reality for years.

During what she now calls her “freedom week,” she finally told the truth: she had been sexually abused as a child. For years she walked around with that weight, pretending everything was fine. On paper, she was winning—28 years old, successful, able to buy things no one in her family had ever dreamed of. But none of that touched the sadness. None of it erased the shame. She kept people at arm’s length, especially men, because she figured if they knew, they wouldn’t love her.

Allison met the Lord Jesus Christ as a teenager, and becoming a Christian brought her comfort—but that pain she carried was deeply rooted, untouched, and unhealed. That changed when Jason, a guy she barely knew, gave her the push she didn’t even know she needed.

Isaiah 26:3 (NLT) says, “You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you!” That kind of peace doesn’t come from our circumstances getting better—it comes from trusting God, period. Philippians 4:7 reminds us that His peace “exceeds anything we can understand.” We don’t need all the answers to our problems—we just need to trust God as He guides our path.

When her church announced a singles retreat, Allison signed up. She was tired, spiritually and emotionally, and needed some time with God. Jason had only been at the church a couple months, but he signed up too.

The retreat lasted four days and three nights. Friday was known as “freedom night,” where attendees were invited to share a truth no one else knew—something from the heart and led by the Spirit. When the pastor asked for the first volunteer, Jason stood up. Well-spoken and confident, he seemed like the obvious choice to go first. But his tenderness and vulnerability caught Allison off guard.

He told them he had never met his parents and had grown up in foster care until he turned eighteen. After high school, he joined the Army and built his life from there. Allison admired his openness but told herself she could never do the same.

During the break, Jason sat next to Allison. She told him she admired his honesty. He told her there was a time he never would’ve said a word about his past, but now, “It doesn’t define me anymore. My faith in God through the Lord Jesus Christ defines who I am.” When Allison admitted she was too shy to share anything personal, he looked her in the eye and said, “Whatever it is, don’t be afraid to tell your story. Somebody else’s freedom might be tied to it.”

Those words stuck. Later that night, after the crowd thinned, Allison stood up. Her hands were shaking. Her voice almost cracked. But she told it. She said out loud what had haunted her for years. And when she did, it was like a lock came off her heart. She felt lighter. She finally understood what it meant to be free in Christ—that nothing from your past can keep you chained if you belong to Him. As John 8:36 (NLT) reminds us, “So if the Son sets you free, you are truly free.” And that night, Allison felt that freedom for the very first time.

The next day, a woman she didn’t even know came up to her and said, “I went through the same thing… and hearing you speak gave me hope.”

Galatians 5:1 (NLT) says, “Christ has set us free to live a free life. So take your stand! Never again let anyone put a harness of slavery on you.” This is the truth: if you’re in Christ, freedom is your birthright. Don’t let shame, fear, or what people might think keep you in bondage another day.

Don’t let yesterday’s chains keep you from today’s joy. Christ already broke them, so don’t just stand there—walk free. Tell your story, even if your voice shakes. Somebody out there is waiting for the hope you carry. Somebody’s been praying for the words that are sitting in your mouth. And when you speak, you might just watch the chains fall off them, the same way they fell off you.

Because this is the truth—no chain is too strong, no shame too heavy, and no past too dark for the love of Jesus Christ. And when He says you’re free, you’re indeed. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“A Secret Too Heavy to Carry”, written by Kim for https://rescuefromdomesticviolence.blogspot.com© 2025. All rights reserved. All praise and honor to God through Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior.