Hebrews 4:15 (NLT) tells us, "This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin."
Difficulties and painful
circumstances are facts of life for everyone, but as a wife coping with the
pain of your husband’s infidelity, it can seem unbearable. The effects of
betrayal can leave you so traumatized that you can barely get out of bed or make
it through the day. I’ve had both the privilege and the responsibility to be a
compassionate ear, confidant, and prayer partner for many women that are
dealing with this kind of pain. No one can deny that this is a situation that
cuts to the core of who we are, but there are other very important discoveries
that God would like to reveal through this level of pain, and we cannot afford
to dismiss any of them.
Pain is not a natural state. It
was introduced into the earth’s realm through disobedience to God’s Word. The
enemy is the architect of pain, and he will try to use the things that are most
precious to us as darts; he aims to pierce us in our most venerable places. We
are sometimes so afflicted from the sting that it paralyzes us in ways we
couldn’t have imagined. It can be a very nauseating and gnawing burden, and it
is not uncommon for us to question why God allows us to be wounded to this
magnitude. The answer to this question is that there is no pain that we
experience that God’s love cannot heal.
Pain is not the best teacher,
because its lessons are harsh. However, as difficult and hurtful as life can be
at times, it is nothing like the pain and hurt that our Lord and Savior endured
on the cross for our sakes. This is a very important truth that our pain
reveals. It allows us to have confidence that Jesus Christ understands our
broken-hearts, because not only do we
have a Savior and Lord who understands our pain, he tells us to bring it to
him, and he will bear the load of it.
God doesn’t cause the problems
that tear relationships apart. 1Corinthians 14:33 tells us that He is not the
author of confusion, but of peace. He wants us to be happy in our
relationships, and this is why He has set His very own standard for the way we
should care for and support one another in a marriage. In His Word, Heavenly
Father tells us that the husband should love his wife as Christ loves the
church, and the woman should honor her husband out of her love for Christ. This
is God’s standard. It guarantees to preserve a marriage through any challenges.
So, neither God or His Word has failed us in any respect, but all of us must admit
that do not always put on His standard of love in our marriages, and we need to
seek God’s forgiveness.
God’s heart is not for us to
wallow in self-condemnation. We ask for forgiveness because it demonstrates our
humility and desire to put God first; and to recognize that His Word cannot
fail. Forgiveness puts us in right standing, and it opens us to receive more of
God’s instruction in righteousness.
The standard of love that God
has set is personified in Christ. We are the bride of Christ, and he is our
bridegroom. He loves us so much, and his passion is to care for us and support
us in every way. We make mistakes and we get hurt, but even in the middle of
our disappointment we have to remember that we are the light of Christ. The
pain we may experience feels very dark and heavy, but we outshine it through
the power of the Holy Spirit that indwells us.
A woman said to me that when she first dating her husband, something on the inside of her felt wrong every time
they met, but he treated her so well. She fell in love with him a few years
ago, and they were married. He has betrayed the marriage through infidelity,
and she feels that she is now experiencing such loss because she ignored her
instincts. The truth is that most of us are willing to take such risks on love
because deep down we know that when love is right it’s totally worth it. We
shouldn’t condemn ourselves for taking the leap. We should, however, put
ourselves in the arms of the Father and ask Him to teach us how to better guard
our hearts, so that we’re in a prime position to both give and receive love His
way.
If you have been betrayed by
your husband or the person you love, know that you are more than a conqueror
through Christ. You will overcome through his strength. We know that we will experience
tribulations in life, but God has told us to persist and endure through them.
We might get knocked down, but we get back up. God is developing in each of us
such a posture that we will run this race with endurance, always looking ahead
to victory in Christ and never looking back; no matter how bad or hurtful
things may appear. Our hope, our confidence, must always be in Christ.
The bottom line is that in whatever form it is that we are broken, and no matter how it is that we have come to be that way, God will heal us. We will breakthrough our storms, tribulations, and wilderness experiences through Christ, our Lord. And one day, we will come to see that God’s deliverance has given us greater authority in Christ, and through it we will help someone else come into healing as we have.
Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.
"Overcoming the Hurt of Betrayal" written by Kim for https://rescuefromdomesticviolence.blogspot.com© 2021. All rights reserved. All praise and honor to God through Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior
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